again and again

he doesn't read here.

i won't let him because i prefer to have this spot to my own, prefer still to maintain control over what he can know about me.

but i send him some of my writings that i post here sometimes, so he knows the things i have yet to learn how to say aloud, so he knows how my body waits for him, how my mind sometimes cannot seem to turn away from sex, just becomes consumed by it, and it is because of him.

once, while chatting, he typed this to me (having read trickle I and trickle II )

'i worry somewhat that i've awakened something in you that may take away from your life - but moments later i feel the intense satisfaction of the knowledge of your increasing womanhood and self-confidence- pleasure and pain from pleasure - how your every future partner will benefit from our experience...but oh how I want to have you first - again and again'

again and again, yes. so hot.