5. my story -first love

And where were my boyfriend and I during all this emailing?

So far, I have told you little about my ex , my X as I’ll call him.

But really you must realize that until very recently, T was no more than a blip in the steady pulse that was my relationship with my boyfriend.

I could fill pages and pages about X. I mean, he was/is/was my first love. Do I need to say more? Much of what you read here will perhaps be far too familiar to you.

We discovered everything together. We dealt with things as they came along. We discovered sex through frantic fumblings. We discovered jealousy when I felt that he flirted with my girl friends, when he felt that I pranced around in skirts that were ‘too short’. We dodged every silly little thing thrown our way.

We witnessed the death of our initial burning need to spend every second together, did not pause too long to mourn it, matured for it. We learnt of the energy it takes to maintain a relationship.

Nothing shook us. We were a couple, known to be that ‘solid’ couple in our group of friends. Already, we bickered about how we would raise our future children. Mostly we understood the comfort we could find in each other’s arms, an anchor to each other. It was the part that I loved about him the most.

He really was a rock, he committed to me right from the beginning. I was his girl, and nothing could change that.

Damn.

Do I go on or do I stop to cry?