Tuesday, June 13, 2006

19. when we can- wonder

Dear T,

Here is the danger in my thoughts, in any controlled experiment like this. The questions I ask that I know I shouldn’t.

If you had seen me a little more often, for longer visits, if we had lived in the same city, gone out and done things together, would you have at least kissed me?

It’s not that I had an expectation, but I just want to know.

I want to know.

Why wouldn’t you kiss me? You admitted it yourself.

Why didn’t you want to? Why didn’t you even for a moment see me that way?

I would have kissed you. That much is sure.

I know it doesn’t matter. But your kiss still haunts my dreams

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